You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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