New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
