Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
