Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
this boner is exhausting
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
