Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
