Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
