sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
