Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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