Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
