I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
