what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize