Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
