had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
