i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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