what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Is it because I queefed?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
