shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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