My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
