things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
