grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
