Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
soo... how was my night?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
