She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
