found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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