I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
