I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
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