i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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