Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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