Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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