If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Congratulations! We have a period
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