so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize