Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
