I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
My pussy is not your playground.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
