I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
