I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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