This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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