A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
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