This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
You did what with his pubic hair?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
