turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I just want nice things and good sex
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
And then he peed in my hair
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