It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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