Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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