I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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