Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
