bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
