Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
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