is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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