i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
