We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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