Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Dicks are not precious.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
