All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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