how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
