You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
